Okay I need your opinion on something. I am a 30-year-old drop-dead gorgeous woman, no kids, never married, college graduate, and have a great job. I’m also a self professed and proud GOLD DIGGER. Yep, I said it…GOLD DIGGER. My question to you is, what’s wrong with that? I don’t go after married men, but I only date men that have the funds and means to provide me with the things I like. There is sex involved only because I was in long-term relationships with a few of these men. I have dated between relationships, but no sex was involved. The men just enjoyed taking care of me. What’s wrong with that? They take me on expensive trips, buy me very lavish jewelry, clothes and cars, I even had one buy me the home I am living in right now. Yes, I have my own money, but why should I spend my own when I can have them do it for me? I work hard for my money, so why should I have to spend it on stupid stuff like bills, and well…anything other than me?
Gold Digger and Proud of It!
Dear Gold Digger and Proud of it,
Just the fact that you wrote me this crazy letter speaks volumes. If you are so proud of your “Gold Diggerness”, why are you asking me if it’s okay? That means somewhere in that gold studded brain of yours you feel you’re doing something wrong.
In all honesty, I have no issue with you being a Gold Digger. If all parties involved are aware of what’s going on and are okay with it, who am I to judge? I won’t go into the whole psychological breakdown that you must have low self esteem or were poor as a child because I know a few “gold diggers” and that is far from the case. IF however this is the case for you, I would tell you to find ways to fill the voids by doing things for yourself. I know you said paying bills was “stupid”, but the feeling of gratification you get from walking into a house and flicking on the lights that you paid for on your own is better than anything. Now, not knocking the “stuff”. Hell, I love nice things too! If I could, I’d have a whole closet full of Prada and Coach Bags with the shoes to match. You should love nice things; nothing wrong with that. The problem comes in when having those nice things takes away from the person you are. Don’t be so consumed with having these material things that you (and the men you are dating) miss out on all the wonderful things that are IN you. Those things should just be accessories to the most precious and exclusive thing in the world…YOU!
Vonda Howard is the author of four novels, including the widely popular, D-Cup Dives Series that features sexy, and confident plus sized women. She is also the Editor-In-Chief of Black Literature Magazine. She also enjoys appletinis, gummy bears, Chipotle and all things filled with glitter and sparkles.